Hitchcock

 

Today is 12.31.20.  I’ve watched 11 Alfred Hitchcock movies, all rented from the library, thus far and have two more checked out from the library at this time.  I suggest a possible 2021 New Year’s Resolution be to watch as many Alfred Hitchcock movies as you can find. 

In addition to watching his films, I have done extensive research online about Hitchcock on many websites over the past couple of months and recently read a biography book about his life and career.  One fascinating fact is Hitchcock spent much of his free time as a teenager and young adult sitting in the courthouse, watching criminal cases, especially relating to crimes committed by the mentally insane. 

In addition, Hitchcock always had a brief moment ‘cameo’ in his movies and it’s exciting to spot him in each movie.  He’s an unmistakable big man.

 

Most movies have the most amazing soundtrack with orchestras that literally use music to freak people out, increase their heart beats and build suspense, terror and fear.

My boys, Gabriel & Philip, have watched most of these movies with Jimmy & I.  Most of these movies were produced before movies were rated.  I’d say this has been a quite educational project for us all to learn about Hitchcock’s style as well as the history of movie making. 

Hitchcock was born in 1899 in England and produced 54 movies.  He was known as the “Master of Suspense” and has many #1 movies ranging from murder mysteries, spies, lies & stealing, thievery and psychosis.  Directing mostly black-and-white movies in the 1930s-1960s, Hitchcock pioneered cinema’s criminal scene all the way to Hollywood, Golden Globes, Academy Awards and the Life Time Achievement Award.  Queen Elizabeth knighted Hitchcock in 1980, the same year of his death.

Here are the movies I’ve seen in the order I watched them and my own one-sentence description-

Psycho – 1960 – A murder mystery about a women who steals $40,000 and was murdered in the shower at a motel by a mentally deranged man who lives in the most famous scary mansions up on a hill.  (The murder scene used chocolate syrup for the blood to wash down the drain and took three days to film with 78 cameras.)

Alfred’s only daughter, Pat Hitchock, plays Caroline, the younger sister. 

Vertigo – 1958 – A constantly surprising, twisted story in SF about a police officer who gets vertigo and is hired by an old friend to stalk his wife, only to find out his friend’s devious secret. 

Stars James Stewart. 

The Birds – 1963 – A disturbing story taking place in Bodega Bay, CA in which nature goes amuck. 

Stars Tippi Hedren.

Dial M for Murder – 1954 – Takes place in one set about a husband who arranges to have his wife murdered, but she fought back and killed the man who was hired to murder her. 

Stars Grace Kelly.

To Catch a Thief – 1955 – A copycat thief in the French Riviera is sought after by the original thief.

Stars Grace Kelley and Cary Grant.

North by Northwest – 1959 – A mistaken identity and spy ring with a scavenger hunt across the country.

Stars Cary Grant.

Rear Window – 1954 – Takes place in one set about a wheel-chaired man who spies on his neighbors and becomes concerned about a possible murder in an apartment across the way.

Stars James Stewart.

Strangers on a Train – 1951 – A psychotic man invents his own murder agreement to kill a famous tennis star’s wife if he kills his own father. 

Stars Farley Granger and again Pat Hitchock plays the younger sister role. 

Marnie – 1964 – A woman with a traumatic event from when she was 5 years old is discovered for being a cheat, a liar and a thief by a man who marries her.

Stars Tippi Hedren and Sean Connery.

Rebecca – 1940 – Hitchock’s first film out of Hollywood about a man who supposedly lost his wife in the sea and marries another woman to take her place, only to discover what really happened to the first wife.

Rope – 1948 – Filmed in one set with one take in which two friends kill their mutual friend just for fun and then host a party with their deceased friend’s family, when a suspicious professor shows up and gets too curious about a mysterious trunk in the room. 

Stars Farley Granger and James Stewart.

Notorious – 1946 – An American agent has to get a Nazi kingpen to fall in love with her to help find hiding Nazis in Rio, Brazil. 

Stars Cary Grant.

The Lodger – 1927 – tbd.  But, (A story based off of Jack the Ripper in which a landlady suspects her tenant of being a maniac who kills women.)

Sabotage – 1936 – tbd.

The Man Who Knew Too Much – 1934 – tbd.

Stars James (Jimmy) Stewart.

 

Yes, Jimmy Stewart was in four of Hitchcock’s movies.  He’s a hunk!  And double yes, Tippi had a seven year contract with Hitchcock, but had to withdraw after the mental demands of The Birds and Marnie.  And triple yes, a very young Sean Connery worked with Hitchcock. 

Here is how I would rank the movies I’ve seen-

Tied for #1-

Vertigo, Psycho, The Birds, Dial M for Murder and Rear Window.

Tied for #2-

Strangers on a Train, Rope, North by Northwest.

But, all are excellently amazing in their unique way and I hope you enjoy one or any that you may watch in 2021.  Below is the list of ALL of Hitchock’s movies and it’s impressive to see how many movies he directed, many of which in the same year.  You could print the list and mark off the one’s you watch if you accept this challenge.

May we all have a happier new year in 2021.

Love,

Susan

 

1920	The Great Day
1921	The Princess of New York
1921	The Mystery Road
1921	Dangerous Lies
1921	The Call of Youth
1921	The Bonnie Brier Bush
1921	Appearances
1922	Three Live Ghosts
1922	Tell Your Children
1922	The Spanish Jade
1922	Number 13
1922	The Man from Home
1922	Love's Boomerang
1923	Woman to Woman
1923	The White Shadow
1923	Always Tell Your Wife
1924	The Passionate Adventure
1925	The Prude's Fall
1925	The Pleasure Garden
1925	The Blackguard
1927	The Ring
1927	The Mountain Eagle
1927	The Lodger: A Story of the London Fog
1927	Downhill
1928	The Farmer's Wife
1928	Easy Virtue
1928	Champagne
1929	The Manxman
1929	Blackmail
1930	Murder!
1930	Juno and the Paycock
1930	Elstree Calling
1930	An Elastic Affair
1931	The Skin Game
1931	Rich and Strange
1931	Mary
1932	Number Seventeen
1932	Lord Camber's Ladies
1934	Waltzes from Vienna
1934	The Man Who Knew Too Much
1935	The 39 Steps
1936	Secret Agent
1936	Sabotage
1937	Young and Innocent
1938	The Lady Vanishes
1939	Jamaica Inn
1940	Rebecca
1940	Foreign Correspondent
1941	Suspicion
1941	Mr. & Mrs. Smith
1942	Saboteur
1943	Shadow of a Doubt
1944	Lifeboat
1944	The Fighting Generation
1945	Spellbound
1946	Notorious
1947	The Paradine Case
1948	Rope
1949	Under Capricorn
1950	Stage Fright
1951	Strangers on a Train
1953	I Confess
1954	Rear Window
1954	Dial M for Murder
1955	The Trouble with Harry
1955	To Catch a Thief
1956	The Wrong Man
1956	The Man Who Knew Too Much
1958	Vertigo
1959	North by Northwest
1960	Psycho
1963	The Birds
1964	Marnie
1966	Torn Curtain
1969	Topaz
1972	Frenzy
1976	Family Plot

 

Email to my work's leadership confirming time off - 12.21.20

 

12/21/20

Dear,

I am writing to confirm I need to take the month of January off for medical reasons. 

My hope is to return to work on Monday, Feb 1^st, good to go to rock on in 2021.

To briefly explain, my nervous system still needs to heal.  I suffered a sudden facial paralysis in June 2019 and my body has not healed from the damage caused by that virus attack.  I plan to use January to see a new Neurologist that specializes in the facial nerve on the 7^th and then invest time & space daily to healing.  The nervous system is extremely important and out of our control in many ways, so I need some more time and space to focus on healing. 

Finally, I want to affirm I am a dedicated CSU Global employee.  I’ve worked here since March 2015 and I want to continue to working here.  I want to make it extremely clear that I do not ‘want’ to take January off, rather I ‘want’ to work.  However, I must respect my body and acknowledge that my health is not very good and so I ‘need’ to take this sick-time and short-term disability time off. 

I will miss you all.  I love CSU Global.  Thank you for allowing me to take this time to have the space to work on healing.  Happy holiday to all of you and yours and may 2021 be filled with goodness for us all.

Sincerely,

Susan

Email to my work's leadership about taking off more time from 12.7.20

 

12/7/21

Dear,

I am writing to unfortunately share an update on my health.

It’s been a year and a half since my trigeminal left nerve suddenly was attacked by the Shingles virus that caused facial paralysis and I’ve not fully healed.  In fact, I am suffering day to day with the pain still.  The left side of my head that was paralyzed continues to feel pain all day every day, in particular my left eye and ear, my left scalp and throat, my left face.  The left eye is the worst, since my left eye’s vision is blurry and thus causes me sharp left temple headaches daily.  I am secretly taking Ibu & Tylenol daily just to stay upright and logged in.

I finally allowed Jimmy to make an appt and take me to an eye doctor appt last Tuesday, who prescribed me two kinds of eye drops to help with the pain and promote good health.  However, yesterday I developed a purple spot on my left eye lid accompanied with more pain.  See attached for pics.  I’m grateful the eye doctor was on call yesterday, on a Sunday, and he told me to stop taking the two eye drops and said he does not feel he can help me.  He said my problems are not just related to my eye, but to my nervous system and recommended I go see a Trigeminal Nerve Neurologist at University Hospital and gave me their contact info.

Sob.

So, I have to decide if I should start over again with doctors and go through this all again like I did when I was out in 2019 for seven months on medical leave.  Or, continue to try to live with the pain.  I admit, I cannot continue to keep staring at a screen 40 hours a week as I am now.  I’ve even tried wearing an eye patch while I work and it’s ridiculous.  These blue blocker glasses are not doing anything either. 

I really wish HR would buy me a cordless ear piece like I had for my right ear so that I could stand up and walk around while I’m on the phone.  Sitting here staring at this computer eight hours a day is SO bad for me.  Like, SO SO SO bad.

I am taking the week of Dec 28^th off as vacation.  I have an idea.  Would you support me?  What if I took off the two weeks after my vacation as sick leave so I could go to this specialized Neurologist.  I would take that time to try and heal and figure out a way to do this job with this medical issue.  If it is determined I cannot return to work after two weeks, I would go on short-term disability until I could hopefully return to work healthily or go on long-term disability after 90 days out.  FMLA maybe again?

Sob.

Here is a Stand-Up I hosted in Feb 2020 with My Story, in case you want to take 30 minutes to watch and understand more about what happened to me.

I’m 39 and feel young, but I may be permanently disabled.  I love my job and I love working for CSU Global.  I do not want to quit.  However, I have a serious medical situation with my nervous system that is preventing me from living a normal life and I feel quite devastated to write this email.

In conclusion, I repeat, would you support me taking the first two weeks of Jan off from work? That would mean I would not contribute to Winter C, sob.  I hope I can make it until then, as I may even have to log off early today due to the bruising of my left eye and the pain.  I’m trying to… push through though.

You have permission to tell whomever you need as I am an open book regarding this situation.

Thank you for being with me as I deal with this unfortunate medical situation,

Susan

Email to friends and family - It’s all about love, gratitude and kindness

I am writing to share an update about my health. 

I went to the ER seven months ago today.  That date seems so long ago, as if time has gone by slowly.  I remember reading about my first diagnosis, Bell’s Palsy, and learning that it could take up to six months to get better.  I never thought back then that I would still be struggling with this illness in 2020.  Then, I remember reading about my second diagnosis, Ramsay Hung Syndrome, and being told by the Neurologist that this could take months to years to heal.  It’s hard to accept that I am still sick and not better yet.

Although, I am getting better.  I’m not healed yet, though, but I am healing. 

A good sign, no, a great sign is that I’m back to work.  I returned to CSU Global last week on Tuesday and received the warmest welcome from my colleagues.  It felt good to connect with people I’ve missed so much and who expressed how much they had missed me too, with abundant offers of support and help.  I’m taking it very slowly as I transition back to the routine so that my body can continue to heal.  I would not want to have a relapse.  I’m so thankful I can work full-time at home and that my employer allows some flexibility for me to readjust to having a work schedule while still going to a few weekly medical appointments. 

So mentally, my spirit is up and I am filled with gratefulness.  I affirm that life is all about kindness and being kind is all about love and gratitude. 

Physically, I am stronger, have less pain and able. 

However, I admit I still have a long way to go.  The virus really destroyed a lot of my nerves in my left scalp, skull, ear, face and throat.  All of my five senses were thus effected.  Even though the facial paralysis got better after a few months, it takes a long time to regrow nerves and rehab muscles.  My left ear’s hearing is still recovering as is my left tongue’s taste buds and my left nostril’s sense of smell.  The hardest part to heal is my left eye because the six muscles that move the eyeball and affect our vision are very precise, so I still have eye pain from eye strain and blurriness.  My final comment about my body is about the pain I really continue to have in my left ear that barely seems like it is easing up.  I am not in bed anymore all the time though and people won’t know there is anything ill with me by my appearance. 

On a good note, I stopped taking the nerve pain medicine in mid-December.  While I give thanks I had access to such powerful medicine, I am grateful I am off those pills because they really effected my brain.  I still can’t believe I was taking nine pills a day.  Now, I utilize herbal eardrops and CBD oil when my ear pain is intolerable. 

Also on a good note is that my yoga practice is consistent, powerful and nurturing for my mind, body and soul.

I started doing physical therapy with a company called zHealth over a month ago that focuses on the nervous system and that’s been very helpful to rehabilitate my muscles and stimulate my nerves.  I also started about a month ago getting five lidocaine shots in my upper left back/neck every two weeks to help reduce the pain. 

I’d like to give the biggest shout-out that the human language allows me to express to my dear husband.  Jimmy has been extremely loving, supportive, reliable, selfless and comforting throughout this whole illness.  My boys have also amazed me with their resilience, understanding, protectiveness and even patience.  My parents have been present, dedicated and supportive.  My brothers too have been affectionate, caring and helpful.  I have so many friends to honor too and I thank each one of you who has been with me over the past seven months. 

While sick, I read a book called “The Art of Hearing Heartbeats” over the summer and there is a paragraph that I remember that influenced my perspective on life.  It explains how every single human being experiences illnesses, injuries and accidents.  Either directly or indirectly, either short-term or long-term, either minor or major, it is human to get sick, get hurt and have health issues.  This is important for me to realize because it reminds me that hardships are to be expected and I must remember that I can survive most problems that arise.  Most importantly though, I think being there for others when they are in the midst of an illness, injury or accident is vital to our survival.  Life has pain and we can help each other endure.  Love gives hope to those who are sick and hurt.  Again, it’s all about love, gratitude and kindness, especially in times of need, pain and suffering. 

I conclude this update with the simplest reflection from my experience over the past seven months.  Human connections help people make it through life’s challenges.  Whether with a stranger one time, with a friend tons of times or with family periodically, connecting with each other by expressing love and gratitude is the kindness way we can support each other between our birth and final breath. 

Namaste,

Susan

#RamsayHunt
#RamsayHuntSyndrome

Email to work colleagues about returning to work - 2020

Dear,

I wish you three and us all a smooth 2020.  For me, good riddance to 2019.

I had a wonderful Christmas season with my family and am so thankful I could spend time with them.  

I went this week on Tuesday to get the five lidocaine shots in my upper left back & neck for the fourth time, which seem to be helping and so I have my fifth appointment in two weeks to repeat. 

My left eye continues to hurt and my vision’s blurriness worsens, so I went to an opthomologist today and he found bacteria living on my eye lashes.  This could explain the pain and worsening vision, so I will start antibiotic eye drops today for a month.  

The pain from this illness is less and more tolerable, although I acknowledge it is not gone.  I still feel pain in my left ear, skull and neck/throat every day.  But, I’m living with it.  I am still healing.  I am getting better, slowly.  I must say though that I am not healed completely nor totally better. 

I have a few doctor’s appointments next week that I was not able to get done by the New Year.  

My gratitude to my employer and you all is more profound that can be expressed in words.  The gratefulness I feel radiates from my heart and brightens my face.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you CSU Global.  Thank you HR.  Thank you for your patience, understanding, tolerance, support, loyalty, flexibility and care while I lived through the hardest year of my life personally and the worse illness of my life.  I am so grateful for the stability of CSU Global and my colleagues during the past seven months. 

See you all soon,

Susan

La Familia Lopez Smith’s 2019 Reflections for our Holiday Card

La Familia Lopez Smith’s 2019 Reflections for our Holiday Card

This year has been full of amazing accomplishments and difficult hardships.

For the second year in a row, Jimmy’s eldest brother, Wilmer, visited us in February.  This time, he came for a full week with his wife, Yesenia, and we spent three nights at Granby Ranch Resort in the Colorado mountains.  The boys skied every day and one night while the ladies went snowshoeing on top of a mountain along the Alpine Ridge Trail. Wilmer learned about the art of CO breweries.  We all visited the Air Force Academy and Garden of the Gods too.

We had to give our cat, Princeton, away to a friendly neighbor in February because of Susan’s allergies. 
We miss him so much.

Over Spring Break, Susan and the boys flew to Chattanooga to visit “big” Philip and his beautiful wife, Lindsay.   We went to the historic Raccoon Mountain and famous Rock City.  We ate fried chicken and walked across the famous Walnut Street Bridge over the Tennessee River.  We went to Chickamauga National Military Park on top of Lookout Mountain and learned about Civil War history.  We had a “wild” time too staying at their off-the-grid cabin in the hills of Appalachia.  The Smokey Mtns are so pretty.  “Little” Philip enjoyed being with the person for whom he’s named.

Our home had four water leaks in the spring that resulted in us having to redo much of our basement including the guest bedroom as well as the upstairs bathroom. 

Jimmy applied for and earned a promotion to be a Geospatial Data Tech II for Xcel Energy for the electric team.  He is currently on a special project supporting the gas team because he’s an expert is “gas.”  He continues to run along the South Platte River when he can and he’s been reading some leadership books.  Jimmy is the cook of the family and provides delicious dinners during the week and breakfasts too on the weekends. 

Jimmy’s mother, Abuelita, visited for five weeks during the summer.  She and Jimmy went to the top of Pikes Peak.  Abuelita took good care of our home, our yard, the plants, the boys and Susan.  Her career was in nursing.

Gabriel is 11 years old, in 6^th grade and enjoys middle school so far.  He walks to and from school with some boys from our neighborhood and enjoys that freedom and independence.  He’s in honors Language Arts and Math and his electives so far have been PE, computers and Spanish.  Gabriel got a mountain bike for his birthday in May and loves riding it around the neighborhood with friends.  He’s in his 6^th year of piano and likes playing rag songs by Scott Joplin.  He wrote a composition in the spring that won a state contest.  Gabriel continues to be an avid reader and loves books by Rick Riordan (who wrote Percy Jackson).  He also loves fishing now too.

Philip is 8 years old, in 3^rd grade and still plays for the Penguins soccer team.  He continues to be a smart math student and has gotten into going to the skate park with his best friend to ride their scooters.  Philip is in his 3^rd year of piano and is also in his 3^rd hymn book.  We recently finished the Fablehaven series that took us almost two years to make it through the five big books.  We are now on to the next Fablehaven series called Dragonwatch.  Philip also loves reading Big Nate and The Hardy Boys.  He likes Scooby Doo too and watching movies.  We went camping for his birthday at the Arkansas Headwaters Recreation Area State Park with four families.  

Susan’s had a hard year.  She was falsely diagnosed with Bell’s Palsy at an ER at a hospital in the mountains when the family was camping at Eleven Mile State Park over Father’s Day weekend because her left face suddenly became paralyzed.  She was then re-diagnosed with Ramsay Hunt Syndrome (Shingles in her nervous system that caused extensive nerve damage) by an ENT and Neurologist in August because of the severe pain.  Susan has not worked since mid-June and is hoping the pain will subside so she can stop taking all the pain medicine and return to work after the New Year.  She’s grateful for her yoga practice that sustains her as well as having read Crucial Conversations and Dare to Lead (by Brene Brown) for her work’s bookclub and The Art of Hearing Heartbeats for fun.  She’s also very, very thankful for the love and support from her parents and brothers as well as her loyal friends.

We wish you a safe and healthy holidays.  We are hopeful for a good 2020 for us, you and our world. 
We also hope you write back sometime in 2020 so we can connect about life. 
May we all love one another.

Email to my work colleagues called "On the up and up, hopefully, finally" about my Ramsay Hunt Syndrome journey

I have many good things to share that give hope that I am finally on the up and up.

Of the nine pills that the doctors have prescribed for me, I am down to only taking three a day.  That’s good.

I can now do every posture in yoga classes.  That’s good.

I got a MRI of my brain with contrast on Monday and it came back normal.  I had more blood work on Tuesday and it came back normal.  That’s good.

We went to Mt Princeton Hot Springs last week and I soaked in the mineral waters for 16 hours over four days with the hopes of being healed.  That’s good. 

I started taking magnesium vitamins to promote my muscular recovery in my face.  That’s good.

I cooked my three traditional dishes for Thanksgiving and we went to my parent’s to eat with my whole family.  That’s good.

I continue to go to the chiro and acupuncture each week.  That’s good.

I started seeing a health professional weekly through zHealth who gives me drills to do every day that’s like physical therapy for my nervous system.  That’s good.

I experimented with getting three lidocaine injections in my upper left back two weeks ago to reduce swelling and pain with the hopes it would calm down my left neck, ear and head.  I think it helped and so I went again yesterday and got five shots this time, which I think have helped too.  That’s good.

The holidays are upon us and the time of giving, excitement and Christmas music lifts my spirits.  That’s good.

I still tire very easily and so I still give myself lots of rest time during the day and plenty of sleep time during the night.  That’s good.

I got a TENS unit (electrical nerve stimulation) and I’ve been using it on my upper left back & neck to treat pain and encourage nerve regeneration.  That’s good.

I’ve played a lot of Backgammon, chess and other card games lately with Philip and he now can honestly beat me.  That’s good.

Jimmy leaves on Thur for Costa Rica for a week alone to see his family and to take a break.  That’s good.

I feel less pain now, the pain is less when I feel it and it lasts for less time.  That’s good, really good, great actually!!!

I admit I still do not understand how I have Ramsay Hunt Syndrome.  I’ve had several medical tests and every one had normal results.  Yet, the partial facial paralysis and debilitating pain for several months have no other medical conclusion.  What else could I have?  Why did this happen to me?  I’ve accepted that many of my questions will go unanswered.  I just don’t know what happened to my body back in mid-June that caused me so many health issues. 

My goal this month is to strengthen myself physically and mentally.  That’s good.

I’m thinking of a potential return date of 1.7.20 for me to come back to you all.  (My boys don’t have school on 1.6.20 and I want to start working when I can fully focus on me.)  After being so sick and being out for so long, I’m wondering if I could return to work with a 30 hour a week schedule for a month or so.  Is this possible?  It would be good for me.

I am grateful for my employment at CSU Global.  That’s good.

I give thanks for you four and y’all allowing me to email you with my updates.

So, am I finally on the up and up?  I sure hope so.  It’s been six months and I am so ready to be strong, healthy and happy again.  

I wish you all safe and healthy holidays this December 2019,

Susan

#RamsayHuntSyndrome